Monday, October 13, 2008
Dear Crystal:
I don't really know how to tell you this, but your nostrils are insulting.
I think I realized it When we skinny dipped under a state of trance and I saw
you sit on Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're Middle-class enough
to understand That I get turned on by garbage men I'm returning Your ring to
you, but I'll keep The oil stocks as a memory. You should also know that I Never
openly mocked Our friendship .
Good luck on your short-term leave from jail, Wenying
Dear Wenying,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but the mafia wants you. I think I realised it when you put cuffs on me with George Bush and his wife and I saw you sit on my penpal in Ghana. I'm sure you're Middle-class enough to understand that I did a sex-change. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep the oil stocks as a memory. You should also know that I always have felt dirty before egg-plant fetishism.
Go burn,
Cecilia
RULES: Do the "Letter MEME". Tag no less than 5 other people, and leave them a comment, informing them that they have been tagged. Then copy the "How-to" Letter Meme, and finish your Journal entry.
YOURE TAGGED. Clock. Charmaine.
How you do the Letter Meme:
Dear (person that tagged you),I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___. I think I realized it ___2__! _ ___3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enoug h to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___ .
___12___, Your name
1. What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - Our romance is over
Red - Our affair is over
White - I'll join the monastery
Black - I dislike you
Green - Our horoscope doesn't match
Grey - You're a pervert
Yellow - I'm selling myself
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're a loser
Other - I'm in love with your sister
2. Which is your birth month?
January - That night
February - Last year
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on sesame seeds
May - First of May
June - When you put cuffs on me
July - When I threw up
August - When I saw the shrunken head
September - When we skinny dipped
October - When I quoted Santa
November - When your do! g ran amok
December - When I changed tennis shoes
3. Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Pizza - In your camping car
Pasta - Outside of Chicago
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you ate enchilada
Chicken - In your closet
Kabob - With Paris Hilton
Fish - In women's clothing
Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation
Lasagna - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a state of trance
None of the above - With George Bush and his wife
4. What's the color of your socks?Yellow - Hit on
Red - Insult
Black - Ignore
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes offBrown - Put leeches on
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the toupee off
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive out
5. What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My best friend
White - My father
Grey - Bill Clinton
Brown - My fart balloon
Purple - My mustard souffl¨¦
Red - Donald Duck
Blue - My avocado plant
Yellow - My penpal in Ghana
Orange - My Kid Rock-collection
Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper
None - My John F. Kennedy-statue
Other - The crazy monk
6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs - Man
O.C. - Emotional
One Tree Hill - OpenHeroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
House - Scarred
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Mongolic
Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Senile
Top Model - Middle-class
None of the above - Ashamed
7. Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful I've felt
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That Santa doesn't exist
Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage
Depressed - That we're cousins
Excited - That there is no solution to this.
Nervous - The middle-east
Worried - That your Honda sucks
Apathetic - That I did a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster
Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men
Overjoyous - That I'm open
Other - That Extreme Home Makeover sucks
8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your ring
Yellow - Your love letters
Red - YourDarth Vader-poster
Black - Your tame stone
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - The pictures from LA
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your contact book
Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs
Purple - Your old lottery coupons
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your memories from the military service9. The first letter of your first name? A/B - Your photo C/D - The oil stocks E/F - Your neighbour Martin
G/H - My virginity I/J - The results of your blood-sample K/L - Your left ear
M/N - Your suicide note O/P - My common sense Q/R - Your mom S/T - Your
collection of butterflies U/V - Your criminal record W/X - David's tricot
outfits Y/Z - Your grades from coll! ege 10. The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Alway s will remember C/D - Never will forget E/F - Always wanted to break
G/H - Never openly mocked I/J - Always have felt dirty before K/L - Will tell
the authorities about M/N - Told in my confession today about O/P - Was
interviewed by the Times about Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about S/T - Get sick
when I think of U/V - Always will try to forget W/X - Am better off without Y/Z
- Never liked 11. What do you prefer to drink? Water- Our friendship Beer -
Senility Soft drink - A new life as a clone Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo
Milk - The apartment building Wine - Cocaine abuse Cider - A passionate interest
for mice Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations Mineral water - Embarrassing rash Hot
chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism Whisky - To ruin the second world war Other - To
hate the Boston Celtics 12. To which country would you prefer to go on a
vacation? Thailan! d - Warm regards USA - Best regards England - Good luck on
your short-term leave from jail Spain - Go and drown yourself China - Disgusting
regards Germany - With ease Japan - Go burn Greece - Your everlasting enemy
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard Egypt - Fuck off now France - In pain
Other - Greetings to your freaky family
1:30 PM
